Return Yards

Return yards
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Robert Muller ScoringGate Investigation Results

In my investigation, household surveillance footage from the Timmons home was turned over to me, voluntarily, by Daniel Timmons.  Below is a clip that is most relevant.

Danny Circa July 2012ish

::Sits down at computer…..closes out popups from porn sites::

::goes to altavista.com and searches for fantasy football::

::clicks on yahoo fantasy football::

Danny:“Ok so 12 teams, shit do I have 12 friends? KELLYYYYYYYYY – do I have 12 friends?”

Kelly:”Probably not.  I could be in it if you don’t mind losing? There are only a half dozen in TCF…and only 1 of them knows what the fuck that means… but you could give someone free training to be your friend or shit….you could ask your brother?”

Danny: ”Ok if I have to ask Jason I will but no way in hell I’m resorting to Peter’s brother”

Danny: “Ok lets see here…draft date.  shouldn’t they know the date of their own draft?  morons.  ill just leave that and see if they update it later.  “

Danny: “Scoring.  Yahoo default or Custom?  Default!!?! Fuck default.  You think MTV would have had a show called ‘Default My Ride’  What if in season 3 episode 1 they HADNT put a jacuzzi tub in the back of that jackass Nate’s van?  Dumbass Yahoo.  First the draft date now this.  Definitely going custom.  

Let me get Josh to help me out with this though.  He can be the “mad mike” to my “x to the z.”  

This shit will be so custom only the most baddest mofos will be able to compete.  I better call Pozzi…well maybe next year so I can iron out all this shit first.”

WTF is up with this defense scoring?  Defense is half the damn game and should be half the damn points!!!  Doubling, Sacks, Blocked kicks, adding return yards for joshy poo, and subtracting points from those bitches when they allow too many points.  

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG – There is an option for defensive players!!!! “I CAN HAZ ALL DEFENSE?”  JJ Watt first round.

“yo what up josh….yes of course i put in return yards.  wait for both the player AND the defense?  Don’t worry boo i got u.  No josh.  No way.  There is no way I can justify giving more points to QBs with correctly inflated balls.  I know it increases the difficulty and promotes playing like a champion but we both know the NFL has no clear way of verifying accurate PSI at all points of the game.  Think about the weather josh…the weather.”

GO COWBOYS…..yeah americas team!!! thats what I’m talking about.  AMERICA FUCK YEAH